JUST HEARD THIS OUT OF THE CORNER OF MY EAR:
(wish I knew who said it, but thanks anyway)

"When a cat is chasing a mouse, there is no sense in the mouse declaring a cease fire!"

So, let's give this bit of homespun philosophy some perspective in the current UN-Iraq vs. U.S. "situation".

Who is who? Guess that depends on which side of "hollywierd" you live in, no?
10:19

JUST SAW A CLIP OF "the daschle" (Gag me with a spoon!)

I got it!

He is a cross between:

"The Mouse That Roared"
&
"The Mouth That Whithpered".

Does that not sound like an endangered species to you?

09:16

EXTRA! EXTRA! Get your latest here!!!

Need a scorecard to tell your playsers:

Starting with the United League of Nations, we have:

Kofi Aga Khan Annan

Hans Chamberlain Blix

[In spirit & in absentia: Slick Willie "hisself" (sic)]

Representing the Free Peoples French Republic (as opposed to the Vichy Government):

Jacques Goebbels Chirac

Dominique von Ribbentrop

Representing the German Democratic Republic [sic]

Gerhard Stalin Schroeder

Joschka Khruschev-Fischer


Representing The Slave State of Iraq:

Saddam Adolf Hussein

Tariq Goebbels Jr. Aziz


Representing the United States of America:

George Winston Bush

Colin "Ooops" Powell

More to follow.

09:08

I need your help!

I am at a loss.

I just heard (out of the corner of my ear) that one of S.H.s Generals yesterday indicated that they (Iraq) were in complete compliance with all the UN Resolutions (say what?) & are in the midst of completely destroying all those missiles, that they did not have in the first place, but which are in complete compliance with all the UN Resolutions (and are, after all, defensive in nature), albeit at a slower pace than Hans would have preferred!

Pheeeeewwwww!

However, he then proceeded to explain the following: although we are in complete compliance with all UN Resolutions & we do not have any weapons of mass destruction, hereinafter referred to as WMDs [but we will use them if we are attacked by the evil, wicked American-Satans!] we may stop destroying these non-existent missiles if it appears that the Americans are preparing to attack our Sacred country!

Now, bear with me, for here is my confusion:
At present we have been & are enduring humiliation by groveling in front of the ingrates that constitute the Security Council & the barbarians that are for the most part the farce known as the United Nations for the sole purpose of securing their [gag-me-with-a-spoon] moral blessing in our preparations to rid the world of merely one (of many) festering boil(s) on humanity, to whit, S.H..

[How does one secure a moral blessing from an immoral organization?
How does one secure a value from a value-less organization?
After all, what would you call a crime fighting organization which has on its board of directors the greatest criminals in the world? I give you, the U.N..]

[Remember, for bureaucrats, the goal is process. For George W. Bush & America, the goal is freedom, and its attendant virtues/values: truth & justice.]

But, I digress.

We have been embarrassed by the almost devout & devoted friendship of our loving neighbors Canada & Mexico. (The former, so totally dependent on our defense of the continent that its military is virtually non-existent; the latter, well, totally dependent on our economy to support its population with their active participation & support of illegal immigration so that we, the evil Americans Welfare & Social Security systems keep their people from starving to death.) All as prelude & preparation to rid the world of that aforementioned festering boil.

We endure, with clenched teeth, the ingratitude of our allies France, Germany & Russia which have all become 4 letter words & need no further commentary, other than to say tune in to your favorite TV or radio station or read your favorite rag for a complete & better description of their treachery. Again, in advance & preparation to remove that cancer!

And, for the coup de grace [pardon my French] the absolute disgrace of the Turkish Delite. Is this not adding insult to injury? (After all, who stands to benefit more by the removal of S.H. & the overthrow of that regime, besides the Iraqis themselves, than the Turks?) Again, could this not be considered as preparation?

But I digress.

Remember, that the Iraqi General said: if it appears that the American-Satans appear to be preparing to attack the mother of all great nations (Iraq. Iraq? Iraq!)

So, all of this self-imposed [thank you, Colin] grief does not constitute preparation?

Okay, how about this, then:

At present, there are 5 (count them 1-2-3-4-5) U.S. Aircraft Carrier Battle Groups fully armed [& raring to go] deployed in the motherlands/wombs proximity, with a 6th one on the way.

There are thousands of [mostly] smart bombs within striking distance of his house!

There are (many, many) hundreds of aircraft, loaded, fueled & itching to go.

There are approximately 200,000 U.S. & British (thank you Tony, I take back every nasty thought I had about you when you were buddying around with Slick) troops within (virtual) spitting distance of the Generals face.

And, I am quite certain, more, far more, stuff that we do not even know about (yet), all waiting on one word from one man, who happens to be the right man at the right place at the right time for America & humanity, even those creatures that infest that god-awful building on East 42nd Street in Manhattan, NY.

[Why did not those 2 planes strike it if they wanted to make a statement?! Because they knew & know that the UN is their intellectual fertilizer. It is a hotbed for the preservation of tyranny! It is their feeding ground. It should be our next Afghanistan!]

But I digress.

So, the Iraqi General says: they may stop the destruction of their (defensive) missiles if it appears that American-Satans are preparing to attack.

Did I miss something? (Or, did he!?)

That region was the Cradle of Civilization! It is now the stillborn offspring of a monstrous spawn! It must be eliminated. It must be plowed over & the land re-sewn with fertile soil so that a great peoples can be freed to attempt to resume contributing to the greatness of what was, once upon a time, a great heritage. The peoples of that region deserve that, but lack the ability to secure it for themselves. They need help. That help waits along their borders now.

History repeats itself. Did we not do the same thing in Germany & Europe, Japan & Asia, just 6 short decades ago? Is our memory that short? So much for the value of the sound-bite MTV generation! So much for the heritage of the 60's-hippie-flower-children, that are now institutionalized in those same schools, colleges, universities, and the mainstream (read- stagnant swamp) media.

Email flash to the Iraqi General: do not worry about stopping the destruction of those missiles.
Sorry for the inconvenience. We will take care of that problem for you.

And, oh, by the way, kiss your A__ goodbye!

And while you are at it, tell your buddy S.H. to do the same.

From America With Love...

18:51